Wedding Etiquette: The RSVP {Ask a Wedding Planner}


Photo Credit: KLK Photography

Photo Credit: KLK Photography

Invitations: sometimes the biggest source of argument for couples during the wedding planning process. Couples have to selectively, and sometimes painstakingly, pan through every person they have ever known deciding if they make the cut for an invitation.  This is even before you factor in lists from each respective family. Do they invite you, you and a guest, you and your children?

The answers will vary based on anything from budget to venue size. After receiving an invitation in the mail, the respectful guest will, hopefully, RSVP per the instructions on the card.

Here is where the work for the guest begins. Let's look at this example: Your invitation only has your name on it but you want to bring your boyfriend, so you RSVP for two people. You have now just taken a chair from another invited guest, and while you may think, “Oh it will come out in the wash, someone else probably couldn’t come," you couldn’t be more wrong!  Imagine for a moment you are one of exactly 100 invited guests who all have this same mentality, and who are ALL surprisingly free on the day of the wedding… your harmless extra person (along with the 99 other harmless extras) has quickly turned this into a 200 person event.  This will likely double the cost for the couple and perhaps, overflow the event space itself. This situation puts your friends in the awkward position of having to call and tell you that they will not be able to accommodate your boyfriend; or even worse, they may potentially have to make last minute adjustments to their budget and or venue to accommodate all the extras in order to avoid the awkward conversation.

RSVPs are quite possibly the most tedious part of the wedding planning process for any couple, but arguably, the most important one. As a guest, please be mindful with your response by making sure that RSVP by the deadline and only for the people specifically notated on the invitation. 

~The Just Save The Date Girls